The Impact of Acceptance
September 2nd, 2015 // 3:06 pm @ Scott Manning
Acceptance, that one thing that will make you or break you…literally. Every day you decide what you will and won’t accept, things you let slide, things you agree or disagree with, and the actions that you then take and/or settle for all based on what you accept.
As example, a lot of thought and consideration is invested in any client that we might accept, because we’ve been doing this long enough to know of warning signs of cheap clients, problem clients, lazy clients, high-maintenance clients, etc. So, we’re careful to vet them and run them through several litmus tests before we agree to take their money.
That’s another reason why I always initiation every relationship with a paid day of consulting. To meet, work with, get to know someone and him/her to know me, before we move into any other type of more involved relationship.
This, in fact, is the very problem at the core of most all relationships, most people never really “get to know” the person they are dealing with. They stop their relationship “discovery” and “exploring” and getting to know someone at the core as soon as they are met with some form or fashion of immediate gratification.
In business, that would be quick and easy opportunity, or just taking the money of anyone who will offer it up to you. In life, it’s not being discerning enough about those you let close to you, those you invest yourself in, and those you give parts or all of your life too.
There are different degrees of acceptance. For your business partner or life partner, obviously it’s the single most important relationship you will ever have and therefore you should accept nothing short of as-close-to-perfection, compatibility and like-minded principles as possible. Then, as importantly, the promise of committed work on your relationship and continual strive for perfection.
Then you have other relationships, based on how “close” they are to you and how much influence and/or control you allow them to have over your life all depends on how accepting you are able to be without sacrificing yourself, without giving up things that are important to you.
In business, this is the same with your patients, clients, customers and employees.
The good news is you get to pick and choose ALL of your patients, customers, employees, vendors and everything else. The bad news is, if you’re not completely happy and profiting from all the relationships you have in your life and business right now, well, you picked those also.
Now, please listen, this is the biggest fallacy I see people in general make about all things in life…that ANYTHING is actually “equal” and EVERYTHING gets treated the same.
I’m telling you, most everybody approaches daily life and all of their relationships equally. You can’t. At least not and feel good about yourself.
The bottom line is you have to have priorities in life and you have to know in advance what you will accept or not accept; and make up your mind before you have to, well, make up your mind.
Again, in business, you decide what you will tolerate from your patients and customers, what price points you sell at, how hard you work and how much money you will make. In life, you decide the quality of people you spend your time around, the ambitions you pursue, the way you either waste the days or savor the moments.
I truly challenge you to examine who and how you are spending your time, what you are accepting in your life that you know you shouldn’t be. Where are you giving in to your own standards, your own desires, dreams, ambitions. Where are you compromising…
Make a list of the “roles” you fill in your life, like, business partner, key employees, advisor, coach, high level customers, low level customers – then decide what characteristics each of these people need to have, what you’ll accept from them.
HINT: I told you earlier, the closer in, the most intimate, the more impact and influence you have on, for and from – the more you must NOT compromise with what you’ll accept.
Honestly, it’s not hard to determine “who” your best patients & customers should be that you’ll involve yourself with everyday in your business, any more so than it is blatantly obvious “who” the person is that you want for your life partner or business partner.
The solution – LISTEN TO PEOPLE AROUND YOU, they see what you’re doing, they know who you are, they have the insight and as long as you know they are caring about your well-being, then shut up, grow up, get with the program and stop accepting screwed-up situations in your life and business. Fix them before (and I do mean this), before it’s too late.
Probably that’s the best thing I do for my clients, other than tell them the truth, I see what they don’t because they’re “involved” and they listen because they know I care. There is a point at which it is too late…oh you can always change, but you lose a lot of life, time, resources, friends in the process while you’re screwing around pretending something that isn’t “ideal” is. Everything in life really is obvious.
I HATE THE EXPRESSION “too good to be true”…who ever said that must have had a really stupid pathetic life, because life is all about things being soooooo goooood and TRUE. You just have to accept nothing less than that and you’ll have it. Really, it’s about that easy. When you surround yourself with the right people, thoughts, and ideas, it happens like magic.
When you’re around negative people you don’t live life to your potential and you don’t even know it because you choose to not see clearly, not listen to others, to accept the situation; instead of committing to making a different choice and accepting what you deserve instead of settling for what you’ve got.
Your clientele, your prices, your geographic location, your kids’ behavior, your family situation, your relationship, your employees, YOUR REALITY. And on and on.
I’m blown away that some people actually can’t tell you what they want for the rest of their life. They’re lying actually, because everybody knows, just sometimes they’re scared because the future is so much easier to see and talk about than the present situation – and what you should know is, you will always get yourself out of the present, but you’ll only successfully make it to the future if you are clear on what you will and won’t accept for yourself. This goes for business just as it does for life.
Oh, last thing here, if you ever catch yourself accepting less than you know you want or deserve, WAKE UP, because it’s your own fault – you need to go to work on your deserve-levels, your self-esteem, go hang around people who make you feel great about yourself, complement you, go get pampered, you do deserve it, all that you’ve ever wanted. And if some things goes badly, go out to dinner, watch a movie, get out of town for a day or two and start over again… The great thing about “acceptance” is, you can begin anew, right now, in this moment. Today.
Category : Blog
